Good morning, everybody.
Hey, it's great to see everyone.
Thank you for being here.
Hey Robin.
Hey Gary, Gabby.
I, I'm not going to name everybody.
Hey, everyone could be here all day.
So thank you all for being here.
I've had great time reading the stories that were submitted.
I've got I'm going to introduce you to some people who
helped me read them as well.
And but first of all, I'm just going to get right in, get started.
I'm going to start with our community rules, which I will pull up here.
And let me go here and then share my screen of that one.
Just so we are always all on the same page.
Hopefully, you're seeing the rules here.
I am sharing screen yet.
So don't discuss other people's ideas outside this community.
So we're going to be talking about people's stories today.
They've been kind enough to share them with us so we can do that.
So the understanding is that this is a, a zone of integrity.
We're not stealing ideas, we're not talking about what we hear here today.
People are being very vulnerable by showing their stories.
So we're not stealing ideas.
We are being and respecting that vulnerability we're being positive
and constructive and generous.
I'm always remembering that in this community, we see each other as
colleagues, not competitors because frankly none of us could write all
the stories that people want to read.
So there's for us to be worried about that.
Worried about competing with each other.
If you ever have any problems with anyone here in the story, the
community there is that link there, you can re you can, you know, submit
a report anonymously or you can.
Let me know who you are, it's up to you, but I want to make sure that's
in place in case anybody needs it.
Yeah.
So.
If I, I always say I, the only thing I won't tolerate is intolerance.
So if any of this doesn't agree with you, you can fake a, a connection
problem and bow out of the meeting.
And, and we won't say anything else about it, however, I don't
think that's ever happened.
So I'm just keep going to keep moving.
So I'm going to introduce you a little bit to other people that helped me read
stories You may see Michelle Risinger here who taught AP English for many, many years
and did some great commentary on some of these stories that we were looking at.
And she writes literary fiction.
That's one awards.
And she takes part in story a day.
Every year.
Gabrielle Johansen has been in the story day community for quite a while.
Now writes mostly urban fantasy and her short fiction has appeared in
publications like Haven spec, speculative, Marta Pelrine-Bacon is an artist and
writer whose first novel, The Blue Jar was published By plum Tree Books.
Her short fiction's been published in multiple places
and she's been as historian a participants since the beginning.
So, how is this going to work?
I'm going to stop sharing this slides now.
Okay.
So how this is going to work is we got a handful of stories that we
want to talk about this morning.
And the four of us read through the mid some notes on them.
This is something that we do in the superstars group about three times a year,
and we get together and we submit stories to each other and we go through them,
leave comments, and then we get together and have a little discussion about them.
So I am going to start as, let me just minimize that.
So can see what I'm talking about.
Yeah.
So I'm going to talk about the, the stories in general.
I will say the stories.
It was great reading everybody's stories.
Everybody had an important story to tell it was, it was Everyone had deep
stuff to say about human condition.
I, I learned something in most of the stories.
I will say I'm going to start off with like that, that if I'm doing the, the love
sandwich thing, not everyone followed the submission guidelines, it seems silly.
But when somebody says, put your document in 12 point font, you know,
sensible 12 point font like times neuro aerial or something like that,
and double space it and put your page numbers in and put your title in.
There's a reason for them doing that.
And it's not just them being pedantic.
Yes.
Part of it is will you follow instructions and therefore,
will you be easy to work with?
But part of it is when you're reading a lot of stories you, it's kind of just
easier if they all look the same, right?
If, if you're flipping among stories and you have to like keep adjusting to
different types of fonts, and if some of them are really squished together
and, and if, if the reader has to go in and personally double space it,
so they've got some white space on the page, it just irritates them.
And so you don't wanna irritate the person you're submitting the story to,
I wasn't irritated, but if someone is like, I saw an ad for a slash reading
job at a, a magazine, I say job, I think it's a volunteer position.
And they want you to.
50 stories in 10 days every month.
And if somebody, you know, if I'm reading 50 stories in 10 days and someone hasn't
followed the submission guidelines, that's already a black mark against them.
So that was something I noticed do pay attention to submission guidelines.
Didn't much match matter here, but it might in other places.
When we talk about the stories today, we will have suggestions to make.
It's important to remember that if you ask a writer for suggestions on your
story, they're going to give them to you.
You get to ignore them.
You get to say, yeah, that's interesting.
I don't feel that in my gut.
I'm going to ignore you.
Neil.
Gaman says, when someone tells you there's something wrong with your
story, you should listen to them when they try and tell you how
to fix it, they're usually wrong.
And you, you need to figure that out for yourself.
So bear that in mind, too.
If we offer suggestions, which we will try not to do or we might speculate about
how you might fix it, we're not really going to tell you how to fix your stories.
We're just going to say, this is how we reacted to them.
We don't know in this environment.
Much about you.
We don't know who your intended audience is.
So there may be things that we say that you could answer if
we had a discussion about it.
So just bear in mind that we are coming to these stories cold in the superstars
critique group, we tend to get, we, we, I invite people to leave comments at the
beginning of the stories, telling us a bit about, you know, if it's an excerpt from
a novel where we are in the story, or if it is who it's intended for what kind of
feedback you're looking for, if it's just a first draft or if it's a Polish draft.
So these stories didn't benefit from that depth of knowledge that we
have usually when we're doing this.
So there may be some questions that we had that you could you could
answer for us, but remember that every reader coming to your story is coming
to it cold and they don't know you.
And they may know from the publication that it's in, whether it's intended for
speculative fiction readers or children or whatever, we didn't have that knowledge.
So.
Are we doing okay.
Let me just pull all your faces back up.
Any brief questions before we get started here are let's see,
looks like everyone is okay.
All right.
So the first the third, first comment I wanted to make was that opening
lines are really, really important.
And I saw some really good opening lines in here, and I saw some that made me keep
reading for a couple of pages to find out what story was going to be about.
Sort of, so the we'll, we'll probably comment on the one on the stories that
we felt had the best opening lines.
Oh, all right.
So.
I'm going to start by talking about a story.
I'm also not going to mention the writer's names because you can identify yourself
afterwards when in the Q and a section, if you want to, but you don't have to.
So I'm going to start with a story called not today, which really was
a short story and it was about 700 words long, long, and did follow
the submission guidelines well done.
I'm not going to call everyone out, but this one I thought started really well.
I'm going to see if I can go over here.
Sorry, I'm just, okay.
So this one I thought started really well and it started S straightened up sniffing
the air and sheeting, her eyes turned in a circle, scan the horizon so far so good.
There was nothing in sight for the waving grass and the cluster of boulders where
she stood and no sound, but the ever present sh of the wind, like, okay.
So I know a little bit about this person.
I know a little bit bit about where she is in the world.
I know that there's something to be wary of because she's looking around
and she's saying so far so good.
So there's, there's some potential threat there to keep me reading.
There's tons of sensory, sensory detail in this story and I, the, the story had
a, a mantra in it that the character repeats over and over again, and it
just doesn't come in immediately.
It comes in sort of part once the threat appears, the mantra comes in and it was a
really good way to keep us, keep reminding us throughout the story of of that.
And that was something that I think everyone that read it commented on.
So does anyone else have a, any comments on, on this story?
Marta or Gabrielle?
Yeah, I like the use of repetition, like, you know, particularly cuz I know as
a, as a teacher, you're always telling students don't repeat, don't repeat.
But sometimes, sometimes that's a really, sometimes you should.
So I particularly like that, how it should bring it, the seemed like
the pacing of that was pretty good.
Yeah.
And that's something that I, I saw in a few, few stories was pacing was good.
You know, I was.
I was curious for the next detail and then the writer gave it to me.
So I was never like, okay, what's going on here?
You know?
And, and that's something to watch, I think, in your writing too, I
thought the, the mantra was really good and that the author should even
consider just going ahead and making that, the title of their story.
I mean, I just think it would really, you know, if I was flipping through
a table of contents or through a ma a magazine looking up the other offings,
that would definitely, it would grab my attention and make me wanna
read it even before the first line.
That's a really good point.
Actually, if you, if your story is in a collection, then you're going
to get that's what you're going to up against, you know, you're you're,
you need to catch people's eyes.
So a good title and the, the mantra in this case, it was, it was nobody's
dying today is the refrain that, that continues through this story.
So if you compare that to the story, not today, which is kind
of intriguing nobody's dying today could also be an intriguing title.
So I really like this one.
I thought that it was I thought it was, this was very polished.
And let's see if there's anything I wanted to share in particular from this
Yeah.
And just, just being the 700 words, it allows you to not, it
allows you to leave some gaps.
Like we never really know what's Chas.
It turns out somebody chasing this woman in, in this story, she's, she's in a world
where things are, are there's obviously a, an antagonistic force and we never
really find out what's chasing her.
She's got a motivation that keeps pulling her through the whole story that we learn
about very early on, which is somebody in her life that she loves, who she's
gone out into the fields to collect these flowers off their maybe medicinal light.
I'm not quite sure about that either, but I don't really care because it was, it
was enough information and enough tension in the story to keep pulling me through.
And payoff at the end was good.
Cause we find out, you know, whether she escapes or whether she doesn't and we
get to see, you know, we get a hint of what happens to the other person that
she's been alluding to during the story.
So everything tied up really well in this story.
And I liked it.
So thank you for submitting that one secret author.
And then I think I'll move us on to talking.
Cover up in Appalachian.
Now this was an important story.
It's a, a story about a promising black young man who's
killed by a police officer.
And obviously that's a story that is worth investigating and
going into, with to help people.
You know, this is where short stories can shine, where you, you
take people into another life that you might not be able to live.
And yet you, you might be able to experience and increase empathy for
people who you might not be able to empathize with before you read the story.
This happened a lot in a, in a few stories, there were
characters having experiences that
opened up that, that experience to me, there's one later on about anxiety,
which really took me inside that.
So this cover up an Appalachia story.
It's a difficult trick because there's a, there's a mystery in it.
There's kinda a mystery in it.
The people aren't supposed to know, cuz it's a cover up who killed the victim.
So it's difficult.
You've gotta pick the right point of view character for this.
And so I think there was, if there was one flaw with this story, I
felt it felt a little bit more like reading a journalistic report.
Because a lot of it was very hands off.
It was lemme see, this is, I don't wanna just talk about this theoretically.
Let's see if I can pull up an example.
So
you know, there's, there's a line that says no one in Weaver valley
ever imagined a murder being committed in their small mountain town.
The town was dealing with its first murder, which I.
Which could be fine if it was coming from some particular character's
voice, but this is a very OmniGen narrative, which is, is a point of view.
That's fallen out of style and these days readers really
want to be in someone's head.
So I think this story could benefit because it's very I'm trying to,
yeah, I probably should have put clips of these on, on for you.
So for example, it starts actually with a.
A scene at a graveyard, which is great, cuz you wanna be in scenes
with the characters, but it wasn't clear whose point of view we were in.
I think we needed to be in the point of view of the brother who
was standing at the, at the casket.
And then we get some guys, some local guys who were talking about it.
Let's say that's him.
One of the farmers noted in Timmy's direction, Timothy's direction.
They had just read a bit of news relating to his death in the weekly newsletter.
The weekly newsletter was pinned on the billboard, outside the office for more
than 50 years, it was one of Weaver.
Valley's main sources of printed news.
So we're being told all this stuff by a narrator that we haven't met yet.
And in short stories and in the current era, we kind of want a sense of who
is talking to us, whether it's third person slightly removed, whether it's
first person, but that Omni reader who can jump into every character's head
and tell you what they're thinking.
That's the style that's kind of outta fashion.
Because we don't get to because we don't get to empathize with the characters.
That deeply.
I did like the fact that we're talking about black and white people, the author
adhered to the new, newer grammatical rules of capitalizing, both of those.
So that was, that was an interesting thing to notice, cuz that is
the new, the new normal and, and they were going along with that.
Other comments on this story, ladies I was going to say that one of that, it
felt like an important story too, because it was a killing that was not taking
place in a big city, but in a small town.
So I felt like the author was maybe trying to point out, you know, it,
we all know it's a pervasive problem, but we would tend to think of a rural
community as that wouldn't be a problem.
Everybody knows each other.
Right.
So I thought that that was a really interesting.
And, and apt twist on their part.
The thing I found difficult about the OmniGen view was that it, like you
said, they were at the funeral and then there were two farmers talking and
I was like, are the farmers like off the side of the road of the funeral?
So I wanted a few, even if they just, even if the author decides
not to change that point of view, I, I wanted just a few things here
and there to anchor me physically where the action was taking place.
Other than the scene of where the young black man gets shot.
I, I never really, you know, and being told that we were in Weaver
valley, I, I, I wasn't sure where it was happening and, and it doesn't
have to be, you know, pages of, you know, Scenery chewing type writing.
Just, just some little details here and there, I think would,
would take care of that.
And I enjoyed reading it and being from Western North Carolina, I do
have to wonder if that's based on Weaverville, which is a real place.
Okay.
In North Carolina, I don't think we've revalued us anyway.
That's what I thought.
Yeah.
And I felt like, because it was in such a particular place.
I I wanted more, I wanted more voices.
Right.
I wanted to hear, oh, I wanted to hear the voice of the, the people, not like
in dialect or anything, but just, I wanted to feel like I was in Appia I
think I read Barbara King solver's flight behavior and it was set Appalachia and
it wasn't like she was doing accents in the book, but like the way people
talked, the things they talked about, I wanted to be in scenes with people,
you know, like that, anything to add.
The main thing that stood out.
Is that to trust the dialogue that's done what it's doing, because it's
such a powerful moment when, and you can really feel how terrible
it would be for the mother.
And she tells him to get out and then it says and then a certain says she told them
to leave, but the dialogue made it clear.
So to trust that dialogue, cause the dialogue is powerful and
the moment is really important.
And yeah.
So if the dialogue's done that work to trust it, to just do that work, I guess.
Yeah.
So that's, I mean, I think I'm showing that on screen there, you've got the
mother speaking and then the tag, he, the, the sort of, yeah, that's not here is
explaining what just happened and you can, yeah, you can definitely trust the reader.
Because it is such a, I think it just, it, it is such a powerful though.
Obviously it's so nightmares to think about, and then you don't.
Yeah.
You don't need the explanation.
I think it's clear already.
That would be my, to, I think that's often a thing to trust, to trust what
you've set up and it takes a while to, to learn that and to trust it.
And you, you quite often do need pupils to say to you, you know, you've already
said this here and let's move on.
So I think this is also one of those stories where it may be that like
the way it's written now in this, on this year, this happened, and that
happened with a few scenes in it is you telling the story to yourself
and there's a way for you to work.
That brings the, the readers more into each scene.
I think this is Timothy's story, the, the, the brother's story, because it starts
with him at the graveyard and it ends with him in a different place at the end.
So that was good.
I don't think he can be the point of view character because.
He can't see the murder, maybe the Latino kids get to tell part
of the story in their voices.
Maybe they should all have names.
Maybe the cop that does the shooting gets to tell part of the story.
I thought it also did a good job of not be, not making him like evil.
He was actually kind of a victim too, which was interesting.
There were some, there was one, one character I thought was pretty evil,
but I thought it, you know, it showed some, some compassions on it anyway.
So that's, that's a story that did, did a lot of what people always say, you
know, show, don't tell this was doing a little too much telling, telling us what
happened instead of taking us into scenes.
And we just, I think we just all wanted more to be with the characters.
So thank you for sharing that.
I'm going to move us on to show up, which is a story that did a really good job of,
and maybe I will share my screen here.
That's the one.
So this did a really good job of opening the story and letting us know where we
were and who we were with very quickly.
So this is it.
And, and, and also showing us what was at stake very quickly.
This is it.
I'm showing up scared.
I can do this, I can do this.
I can't do this.
And then we have Renee speaking in her own voice, pushing through the
kids, waiting in a ticket lane, running for the bathroom, leaving
her friends staring after her.
I think at this point we don't exactly know turns out she's at a school dance.
I don't think that would surprise anybody having read that opening.
So that was a great setup for that.
And so I think it does a very good job of creating the opening that
sets us in place, tells us who we're with, tells us what their issue is
and and gives us their voice as well.
So Well done on that.
Anybody want to add to that?
I have some other things I could say, but I don't wanna do all the talking.
I also thought the pacing in this, this is one of the ones where I was
particularly struck by the pacing.
Like every time I was curious, okay, what's going to happen next almost
all the way through the, a, the author then moved the action onto the
next thing I thought that was good.
There was one part where she was talking to her friends and she felt
like her friends had betrayed her.
I thought if you needed to, so shorten this, that part,
didn't have a huge impact on me.
I think you could have skipped that if you wanted to tighten it up,
didn't really matter that her, I mean, the other girls could have found
out this secret about her anyway.
You know, they could have found out just from observing her.
Didn't need to be a betrayal by the friends so that didn't really pay off.
I don't think later.
So if you needed to shorten that there are pieces that you could.
There was this, so this one ends up being about social anxiety and I think
again, this is an important story, cuz not only was it entertaining and I
cared about the character very early on.
I was like, I hate the mean girls.
And I actually like was like, I hate these girls and I was in the comments.
And then at the end she learns stuff from, from another person, another
kid at the school who teaches her some techniques for dealing with social anxiety
or anxiety in general that she hadn't learned before this kid knew and had been
practicing and it's, you know, and it, it all fitted in with the, the characters
and their, you know, like little shy, eighth grade relationship developing.
The only thing I think most of us just thought about that was when this other
kid was talking, he sounded a little bit like a pamphlet that you might read rather
than an eighth grader which only stood out because the rest of the dialogue was good.
And, and they really did feel like kids and Michelle, who is not here
this morning, but did read, it has taught for years and years.
And she said, good job doing, you know, catching the, everything
else felt really real that, that these could be eighth graders.
So.
Yeah.
I felt the anxiety I was anxious as well.
And I think you, you want your readers to be feeling stuff while
you're, while they're reading.
That's one of the things that will keep you from yeah, it'll, it'll just
make, make much more of an impact.
If you could think, be thinking about what's the reader feeling
while they're reading this passage, anything to add there?
Gabrielle, I was just going to say, yeah, it was really good at letting
you know, letting me feel her anxiety.
It made me think afterwards, I, and at not at all saying, I want this in the story.
I'm just saying it made me wonder about her afterwards.
Like, well, was there a particular thing that made her that anxious,
you know, and I'm just saying that's like a really good sign.
When you have your reader still thinking about your story, even after it's over.
And, and for me, when I'm thinking about just in a speculative way,
not in a, oh, I wish the author had done this or that or whatever.
But yeah, I thought the pacing was great.
I could totally relate to these characters being eighth graders.
I, I did kind of feel like the part with the, with the best friends, maybe
betraying her was a little unnecessary.
And and I, I, I.
Said that the dialogue between the main character and the young man who comes
to, to talk to her about anxiety, slid a little into that afterschool special,
which means more to Americans of a certain age than than anyone else.
But yeah, they used to be these afterschool specials that were
always like, had a great big, moral or lesson to teach you.
And it was super obvious.
But, but I, I thought it was also just mostly pretty Def in
communicating stuff around anxiety and letting us go along for the ride.
So I really enjoyed.
And I want to say, and I know I said to put an ending on your story, especially
for a first draft like this to put an ending on the story, you can have
something that restates the theme, or you can have, you know, and this one
ended tonight had not gone the way she wanted Renee was scared, but she would
not regret showing up, which is great.
And that's you like restating the theme?
I think sometimes it slides into that after school, you know, special
or ASAPS fable kind of thing, where you, you it's, I think it's
fine to write an ending like that.
It's worth looking at this and saying, is there anything from within the story
that I discovered while I was writing that I could swap out for that, that
would indicate that, but in a, in a more active way, like the actions that she's
taking could show that and the reader would be like, I see what you did there.
Okay.
Got it.
So that's worth looking at as well, so that you don't end up with that kind
of like moral at the end of the tale, even though I think it's a legitimate
technique for getting the story written.
All right, I'm going to move us on to practical joker, which is a story
about a kid who has some special powers and he is not using them for good.
And he gets a little bit of a, a lesson from somebody who comes along into
his life and shows him quite oops, shows him quite viscerally what he is.
Oh, no.
Stop.
My timer refuses to a baby pause.
Okay.
Sorry from that.
So this yeah, so this lesson gets a very visceral lesson on what he's been doing.
It kinda gets turned back on him by this mysterious stranger turns up.
I wasn't clear who the audience for this was with a kid protagonist, you
tend to think the stories for kids.
And as I'm thinking about it now, I'm not sure what's the language in this one.
Kid suitable.
Why need to check that?
Actually?
It was fairly simple language, actually.
I think it probably was kid friendly.
There were some places where we were confused about who was saying what,
because there were two male characters and there were a lot of pronouns and
this mysterious stranger turned up and we weren't sure was he the same person
that the, the kid had interacted with at the beginning because the person
at the beginning hadn't been given any, given any identifying features.
So it turns out that one was a woman.
We found that out later.
So there were just some places where we were a little confused about what
order things were happening in and, and who was, who was showing up.
We also, I think everybody commented on this one, this kid is doing bad
stuff with his superpowers, and we're not sure how to feel about him.
We're not sure why he's doing it, what his motivation is.
And I think if we knew what his motivation was, we would be able to
have a bit more sympathy for him or.
Not so you can play with stuff like that.
You can, you can make a character unlikable and then you can reveal
something about them that makes them suddenly a little bit more likable.
Like this kid learns his lesson because somebody comes
and turns the tables on him.
But I still don't know, is he a good kid or a bad kid?
So maybe understanding something about what, what was motivating him
to go out and use his powers for evil?
Would've been helpful, anything to add there?
I think it might have also been, I, I thought the idea was interesting, you
know, that this kid could have powers and just decide to use it to play what
he saw as practical jokes on people.
But when the tables were turned on, him was really terrifying
stuff for the person receiving it.
It would've helped me to know.
Or maybe just another way to flesh out the character is said that Jimmy had been
doing this for years, but we know Jimmy's still in school, but we don't and lives
at home with his mom and dad, sister, but we don't know how old Jimmy is.
So that also plays into what you know, it's different, right?
If a six year old is doing this versus a 14 year old.
Yeah.
Gosh.
Yeah, that will be one week to just even help us frame how we feel about him.
You tend to be a little more forgiving of a six year old.
And, and I was just going to say, because this character's not quite real to me,
it's just kind of floating when the man comes and shows Charlie what it's like.
And Charlie says, oh, that's it.
I'll never do it again.
I don't quite believe him.
And maybe that, if that was the intent, then good job, you know?
But yeah, I'm kind of like, mm you've been doing it for years.
You have one harrowing experience with this guy and you're just
going to give it all up and, yeah.
Anyway but, but I just, I thought it was such a cool idea.
So it was a lot of fun to read.
Yep.
So I'm going to then move us on to a story that does a really good
job of setting the scene for us.
We knew from the first line.
Kinda what, what kind of story this was going to be and what kind of
ride we written for no pun intended, because this is called the piano horse.
And I am actually going to share the opening of this cuz you can see
then oops, I've shown off the name.
The horse was a piano or perhaps the piano, having gone tired of it.
Sedentary life had decided to sprout wings sprout ahead, tail wings
and become a horse either way.
The piano horse is ivory.
Who's rang out with dings and dogs that have clips and clubs.
We've got, you know, just beautiful.
The horse goes out into the village and, and we just accept
that this is a piano horse.
Now we're like, okay, got a horse.
We're in magical fantasy ish world.
Where they're a piano horses and.
You know, we get to see the, the, how people react to it.
We get these lovely scenes of beautiful music as the towns, folk dance joyfully.
And then, you know, just as we're starting to think.
Mm, well, this is nice, but what's the story.
And evil guy turns up and he's he's suspicious and maybe we needed
to know a little bit more about his motivations as it turns out.
Cuz then that, that is the turning point for the story, which is this
guy comes up and, you know, he wants the horse, he wants the piano horse.
So I think all of us felt like.
It was, it was beautiful and enchanting, and then yeah, there
needed to be a big kind of like, but why am I reading this story?
I said, oh, the guy's coming to the piano horse away.
What's going to happen.
And then you can't stop reading to the end.
But I think all of us kind of wanted to know why the, why the guy was there.
Like you might think it's obvious, it's a piano horse.
He wants to take it and like make his fortune from it.
But I think that needs to be said somewhere in the story.
You know, because if you leave us to make our decision about it, maybe it
was his piano horse, he's kidnapping it back, you know, but just don't
leave the, the reader wondering too much is what I would say there.
And I think there was a few of us felt like there was a lot of fun hanging out
with the piano horse at the beginning and seeing all the things it could
do and how people reacted to it.
But maybe we wanted to get to that sense that the story was turning on
something and where the menace came in and the guy came in just a smidge sooner.
Anybody else?
I just love the idea of the piano horse.
I just say that's like, I really like that.
Yeah.
I just wanted more, like, I felt like I was, I don't no spoilers , but
I, I was glad about the ending, but I felt like I needed something.
I, I don't know.
Like I was so glad that the townspeople were not like, oh, we're going to pun.
We're going to do something terrible horse.
Like the town.
I was really glad about that.
Cuz that seemed more stereotypical, but I wanted something else at the end.
More like what ha.
Something changes.
Let's just say something changes in this story, which changed my
perception of the piano horse.
And I wasn't quite sure how to feel about it at the end.
Right.
Do the people do the people have that same?
Do they know?
I have questions.
So I think that if the PE if I could see the reaction of the
tones people, then I would know I was reacting in the right way.
So just like, it was quite subtle.
And it was, I liked the fact that it was quite subtle, the change at the
end, but I just, I felt like if you can have witnesses telling the reader, yeah.
You're not the only one that feels like this, then you're on the right track.
Yeah.
And after that, we just have one more story to talk about, and then I'm
going to like have a little, we can ask questions, have a little discussion,
and then I've got like a little little pep talk at the end for you.
So the last story is actually was written by Marta.
And so she's probably not going to say too much about it, but she might And I think
this one felt a little different for me to read because I have read Marta's stuff
before, and I know what she's capable of.
I know how she approaches writing and revising and stuff like that.
So I don't know if you, if anyone will notice the difference between how
I talk about this one, but this one opens with a, a good opening line too.
Like Roman waited until the celebrations were over to lead the
castle and see if her family were dead.
Right.
Because that's a kinda opening line that you, you have to keep reading.
The job of the opening line is to make you want to read the next line.
And I think that one definitely fulfills that job.
This is we've heard that, you know, the celebrations were over.
We know our protagonist is called Romana.
She's, there's a celebration going on.
She's going to leave the castle.
So we're probably in some kind of fairy tale or either
historic or fairy tale world.
And she thinks her family might be dead, which makes it, you know, more
old school fairy tale than Disney.
So she goes off kind of on a quest and as she goes off on this quest,
we learn about what's been happening and why her family might be dead.
And it, it plays on traditional fairy tales.
Gabrielle you chime in here.
Did you read this one?
Yes, I read this one.
It was, yeah, it was really cool.
It was you know, it was sleeping beauty, but Roman, our.
Hero of this story is one of the servants in the castle.
Right.
So what I just love the idea of, oh yeah.
Like we never knew in the original fairytale because they're just
the servants, but how did those people feel about being caught
up asleep for a hundred years?
So I, and I, I thought that the pilgrimage for, you know, is one of those things.
It was so relatable.
Romano is like, yes, I understand there is literally no chance that
my family is actually still alive, but I have to see for myself.
And I just felt like that was like just relatable on a human level for
those things that, that, you know, with your head are true, but you, your
heart does not wanna believe, you know?
So I thought that was really cool.
Yeah.
And I, I um, One of the things I noticed in this story that I wanted to highlight
is that if you say something that the reader's going to have questions about,
you really have to answer that objection before they get distracted by it.
So in this story Roman's walking and she's thinking about her mother singing to her.
And she said, you know, she says at her mother at night, she's saying the
loveliest lullabies Ram tried to remember them, how wonderful to recall just a
few bars and already my brain was going.
But like, surely if you were asleep for a hundred years, it would just feel like
you, you were just were awake yesterday and you would remember everything.
And I just like started to form that thought in my head, but the next line
is, but the long sleep had her memory.
So you've got And immediate, like, don't get distracted by that.
I got an answer.
That's a reason for that.
And I think if you get feedback from people and they're like, I was wondering
why that happened or that took me outta the story, this is a great way to do it.
You just sort of like highlight it and go, yeah.
Well, here's the reason.
And you don't really have to explain it.
It's it's fine.
And then something else in this story that one of the other readers commented on was
something else I want to just highlight and, and bring to your awareness.
As you're writing stories is having changes of rhythm.
So we've got these long, you know, long kind of melodic sentences.
No one worked the tiny gardens, no children ran about the trees or
laundry hanging from the string, but the sight of the new world.
And then we've got, it had been a hundred years.
It was not a.
It was not a trick.
And like she's having this emotional realization and the language changes.
It's like a series of punches and the language gets punchy as well.
So that's something definitely to bear in mind, as you are trying to evoke emotions
in readers using the actual rhythm of the language can be incredibly effective.
I think this story had the theme of a lemon cake running through it.
There was a lemon cake at the beginning, which wasn't good,
and a lemon cake at the end.
It was and that was, it's always nice to have that repetition.
And I think the only thing that I, all of the readers wanted was
at the end we wanted, we, you know, there's a nice sense of.
Change at the end, some things change.
Roman gets some of, some of what she, she wanted to know.
She gets knowledge and there's a nice the last line ties into the theme.
She says, thank you to the old woman I'm awake.
And so I, I think there were a couple of things in here, the theme
of sleep and being awake that could maybe come up more on her walk.
She's being she's trudging along.
There was another story.
The there was another story that had a good, you know, like that sense of
when you're walking and it just the Which story was it the not today where
the characters running away from people had this sense that like your legs are
just pumping and you're just moving.
And it's like, you're an automatic pilot.
And I wondered, you know, like in this story, she's coming out of sleep.
And so as she's walking, is there any of that sleepiness and then at the, because
the payoff at the end is she's awake.
And I think we wanted to know who the woman was that she met.
And was she a distant relative?
We were rooting for her to be a distant relative.
I think it felt like we wanted, we wanted her to find someone no
matter how distantly connected, but maybe we're just all romantics.
You could thwart that entirely up to you.
Look that evil smile.
So those were the, some of the stories that we read, these stories were
written in a week, folks and everybody wrote about something important.
Everybody shared a human experience.
I want to ask, I'm going to let anybody who's here who was writing and has
questions or has questions about anything?
We discussed, ask questions in a second, but first of all, I want to
talk to our readers or anyone else.
Who's I see some other superstars here who we do this, right?
We do this three times a year for each other.
How the experience of reading these stories for you?
Did it feel like a burden?
Did you get anything out of it?
I like, I love critique week reading the other story, seeing what other people do.
Sometimes I helps me think of, oh, that's a good way to do that in this
story, I could do something similar gets me to see my own stories differently.
And also side note is every story I've had published since being part of
story day, went through critique week.
like the feedback was very helpful, extremely helpful.
So so those reasons it's been valuable to me.
I suspect it's also like, not even just the feedback that you get from people
in the group though, but the process of critiquing other people's stories,
like you said, you're like, Ooh, I could, that, that might, you know, so.
You tend to, I tend to comment on stuff for other people that
I'm working on in my own writing.
And then I'm like, oh, maybe if I tried this, you know?
Yeah.
I think it makes, it makes, it's just like having students peer review, right?
You look at something and you learn things and it makes you stronger and
also teaches you to under how to handle people's feedback as well, because you're
giving feedback, which is also important.
That's a good point.
And that is why one of the reasons why when I run when I run
critique groups, you have to be submitting to be allowed to comment.
This is an exception.
Actually.
I asked a couple of people to help me out with this.
Just to make sure, you know, I wasn't, it wasn't just one voice.
But usually when I run critique groups, I make sure that people have
submitted a story too, because you are just a little more aware that
you're going to be hearing from other people as you make your comments.
You're like, I will think of a nice way to say this.
This could be stronger rather than this is total nonsense, which you know,
well, how to give constructive feedback is, is just a good skill I
think, to have in life in general.
But yeah, in critique week it's also, you know, it's so much fun
to read all the stories and it's cool to comment them on them.
And there's also all these, I don't wanna say selfish reasons, but
self-motivated reasons for doing it because it helps you look at your own
writing in that different way too.
And If you have like more than one reader, point something out then
that really, you know, point the same thing out then you're like, oh, okay.
So that's not just, someone's subjective opinion.
There there's really something here that I need to fix.
And that's always interesting, but just in general, I love reading new stories.
So, you know, I think we're, so I was having this conversation with someone
in here recently where, you know, I'm going to be reading the back of the
ketchup bottle if I'm at a restaurant and forgot to bring a book, you know?
So it's just and, and I loved different people's voices, you know,
just like being astonished by wow.
Like I never would've, I never would've thought of that.
I could never write something this way.
Just all the unique voices is that's one of the best parts of it.
also to piggyback on that too.
You said, as you said, when you have multiple people say point out a similar,
you know, they all kind of like this didn't work can be really helpful.
It's also interesting when you have different perspectives.
Cuz I've had stories where one person's like this didn't work for
me, but someone else is like that.
That was my favorite part.
which could be like, oh no, like kind of confusing, but also makes me think
more about what I want from the story.
you know, and then, you know, which, which vision do I have for it.
So that's also helpful.
Yeah.
I thought it was interesting when we were reviewing Martha's story Michelle
was doing like textual analysis and she was like, oh, here's the turning point?
You know, cuz she was an analyzing story structure and Gabrielle
who writes, you know, fantastical stuff as well was spotting all
the bits where it was adhering to fantasy and fairy tale stories.
And I was just in there going Ooh and Ooh, yum.
And like having an emotional reaction to stuff.
So like , it was kind of fun to see all the different types of feedback that are
helpful perhaps for readers to a writer to see how readers are reacting to it.
So yes, we're Robin.
I did not have the pleasure of reading these stories, but even in this hour
I got so much, I got feedback on point of view on dialogue on characters.
On social issues.
I was just making notes like crazy.
Now, of course, I wanna read all these stories, but that's one
great thing we do at story a day.
We just talk about craft and what works and what's fun.
You know, I was writing down eighth grade point of view.
So just being in the company of other writers and readers is just so great.
So great.
So I just welcome to everyone who gave stories and I applaud your bravery
cuz it's not an easy thing to do, but we're very kind at story today.
for sure.
Thanks Robin.
Does anybody else have any questions about writing in general about this experience?
Anything you want to know, any of the writers of the stories
have any questions for us?
I dunno if you want to out yourselves.
I'll say a quick echo of Robin Robin's sentiment that meeting with other writers
and listening to critiques and what you want from stories is so helpful to keep
you in the mindset of being a writer.
If that makes sense, like it, you internalize a lot of things,
but it also keeps you searching for those things all the time.
I find that to be very true, like I said, I didn't, I also didn't have a,
the, the, I, I wasn't able to reach all stories, but it, it was really nice to
hear what works and what doesn't work and what kind of feelings they bring up for.
You know when people do so anyway, it is a great and wonderful group and it really
has been so helpful for me to be part of.
So, hi, welcome.
thank you.
Christina.
Yeah.
I mean, just keeping that mindset is, is probably the, the most difficult part of
being a writer and, you know, and, you know, coming I'm, I'm so glad that you're
all here today because although you didn't all get to read the stories and you,
you've probably heard a ton of this advice before, but just hearing it over and
over again and hearing different examples of how it can be put into practice.
It hits you differently every time depending on what you're working on,
depending on what stage you're at.
So things that you've, you know, things you've heard for years suddenly makes
sense and things that you used to go, wow.
You're like, yeah.
Okay.
I got that now.
And then.
Getting all that different feedback, like, you know, contradictory feedback
really helps you hone your instincts and like, well, yeah, that's, that's that
one I can ignore because I know what I want the story to be now, which you
don't always know when you're writing.
So
any other questions for people from people?
This is your chance.
You have a bunch of writers here.
You've got a, an issue that's nagging at you or something you're struggling with
and you can put it in the comments too.
If you are shy and don't wanna be on camera, I'll give it a minute.
There.
Good question.
Yes.
Hey Jeanette.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Am you saying your name right?
Is it, is it Jeanette or Jean?
Yeah.
Jeanette.
Yeah.
So you mentioned earlier that kind of the OmniGen point of view is out of style.
What are you, what are your thoughts on kind of balancing writing to what's
in style versus writing to your style?
Like how do we find the happy medium?
I have a real soft spot for the ammunition point of view.
So I, yeah, I understand that.
That's when I'm like I think it's worth listening to people who
say things like that, because if, especially if you want, if you.
Depends on what you want to do, right?
If you desperately wanna get published then, and if you have a particular
publication that you desperately wanna get published in, then you should
go and inhale the, you know, as many issues of that, as you can get your
hands on and absorb what works for them and tailor your voice to the
things that they usually publish, that makes it feel a bit like a job.
So it's worth listening to what's in fashion and why.
So I think the reason that OmniGen is outta fashion is, is because it does keep
the reader a little bit at arms length and it can be used very effectively.
I mean, I think Terry project uses it incredibly effectively
used it incredibly effectively.
So do but it can be done really badly.
And it can just end up reading like a, like a newspaper report.
So I think that's one of, you know, so think about that.
If you, if you're determined that you wanna write in that voice, then.
Figure out why it's not working and then, and balance that with yours.
I, I think the most important thing, regardless of trends or what's,
what's hitting now is finding your voice and figuring out what it is
that, that you bring to stories.
And I don't think you can decide that.
I think you just have to discover it by writing a lot.
And then by sharing and being more, we have somebody in the community here
who is an advocate, strong advocate of leaning into your weird, right.
That took them a while to figure it out.
And then once they figured out that like embracing their weird and being
more weird, being there kind of weird was that was when things got good
and when things started to work.
So I definitely think trying to find your voice is the, I have a question.
Why do you think first person is more.
In style right now, I think it's because there was a massive
surge in young adult publishing in the 2000 early two thousands.
And I think that we tell stories in the first person all the time I
went to the shop, I did this thing.
Oh, let me tell you what happened.
When I, I got together with my crazy friends and we tell things in the
first person, and it's very immediate and you get to be in the person's
head all the time and you get to play with the, the conflict between
external, how I'm presenting myself to the world and my internal commentary.
You know what I really think about those girls I'm talking to.
So I think that's, it's very immediate and it lets the readers make an
instant connection with the character it's limiting in that you can only
see and feel and know what the, the first person character is saying.
So it takes some skill, but I think it's a very relatable point of view because
it's how we all talk to each other.
I think it also gave rise to a lot of the unreliable narrator too, which
is, you know, you can do with first person and is incredibly hard to do.
And yet let the reader know at the same time that this is an unreliable
narrator and going back to the first, like, but what if, what if my style is
to write in OmniGen then get really good?
You know, I mean, you can break any rule or, or style or trend you want,
if your writing is compelling enough and done well enough, Terry PRT is
a perfect case in point, although I suppose he was writing Omni mission
before this newest trend started.
So yeah, just do it really well.
I would agree.
Yeah, I like you's comment here.
I, I find sharing my writing with others makes me feel energized to write more.
Yay.
That me too.
And then Martin, why do you think you never really write in first person?
Do you ever have you thought about it?
Oh yeah, because I know it is kind of more, more the thing.
Right?
First person, I don't like the limit.
I wanna be able to write about parts that the character doesn't know.
Cuz I like to, I typically then if I write in first person, I end up
writing something that is longer.
So it has part of it in first person from one character's point of view
and then part of it in first person from another person's point of view,
cuz I just don't wanna spend that much time with one character generally.
You may have that next.
We see each other in real life.
I I'll give you space,
but I don't know.
I just feel I, I get, I, I just wanna be able to do more things.
So I just think it is working on, you know, I've had in
stories have been published, so I, you know, to get out there.
Yeah.
You just work on it.
I'm curious about Kathryn's question to you.
Do you think the, the decline in Omni mission is because of today's technology?
I'm not quite sure what you mean by that.
Kathryn, do you want expand?
I dunno, if you unmute yourself,
I'm noticing with my grandchildren that.
Their attention span due to texting and that constant technology flush.
They, you know, when they read my stories, they say, oh, it was good, but, but you
know, it is too long and, and they don't seem to want to read more in depth.
And, and we've talked a lot about whether it was the technology or
just some of them don't wanna read.
Yeah.
There's, I've seen a trend in Writing for younger adults to also
write in first first person, but also in present tense, which is
becoming, which is very immediate.
Like, and you, you can't ever be.
I think, I think kids are very savvy about story structure and you like film theory.
I think they just AB they've they've absorbed all this.
So like they know if it's written in third person and past tense that it's
probably that person survives, right.
to the end.
And if you wanna pull them through the story and you're writing it
in first person present tense, you know, I don't think could happen.
So maybe it's some of that, maybe it is the, the changing communication styles
and they're just like sophistication of storytelling that's happened now.
I mean, I find when I go back to classic short stories, I get a little
impatient, so I, I have a comment.
I I, I do struggle with the hands off or, or the show and tell, and
then you guys talk about the trend.
Well, you know, at my age trends are, they're important but important, but
they're not, I just write and, and I don't write to, to, I, I, I probably
break a lot of rules when I'm telling my stories, because I don't tend to lean
towards trends or, or, or what's popular, you know, I just want to get a story out.
I wanna get a good story out and I wanna be able to keep interest in my stories.
But anyway, I just thought I would comment.
My struggles is show and tell and, and the, you know, the narrative.
Yeah.
I, I, the thing that made that work for me was when somebody said to me, it's
like, If you're watching a movie in the theater, like you can see everything
that's happening and the actors are, are, it's all happening on the actor's faces
and it's happening in the dialogue and their body language and stuff like that.
And they said, you know, telling is more like if you're watching that
movie and you're in the moment and you're like, ah, it's so great.
And then somebody tapped you on the shoulder from the row behind and says,
he's feeling really upset right now.
And you're like, I need you to tell me that.
So that's the kind of thing.
Like if you can, if you can keep the, the camera view on your scene,
then you know, you're not telling, you're showing how what's happening.
You're, you're expressing change through how somebody moves and that just, that
just makes people more emotionally connected to what you're doing.
There's a time for telling, you know, if you wanna get your character from here
to somewhere else, it's perfectly fine to say she went for a three mile walk
and, you know, got her got her like.
Wiggles out and came home happy, you know, like that, that would be okay if then the
next scene is important, emotional stuff.
So it's fine sometimes to do that.
And I think like writing to trend is a fools errand
anyway, because trends change.
And by the time you get something written and polished and out there,
the trend may have left station.
So yeah, I mean, the thing to pay attention to is if you're, if you're
breaking the rules and you're losing reader's attention or listeners, if
you're telling the stories verbally, if you're losing their attention,
then it's worth knowing what these rules are and saying, okay, what's
missing or where did I lose them?
So
any other questions or comments.
Well, if thank you all for being here.
I just want to, I've got a little a few comments I wanna make at the
end here and an invitation that I haven't extended for a while.
So I'm going to just I'm going to just show you a few give you
a little pep talk, basically.
We've barely touched on this stuff.
Like we, we've had a little bit of a discussion here, but there's so much in
this there's openings and endings there's character arcs, there's authorial voice,
point of view, all these things that we talked about today, foreshadowing
learning techniques from other writers.
Concise writing impact conflict and stakes, short story pitfalls, all of
this, this stuff that we talk about here, and we've only scratched the surface.
So yeah, here's what else you, you need to know.
I mean, deeper dives into the craft topics.
Mindset is one of the huge things that is valuable.
Hanging out with other writers is valuable for finding out how good
people get through the tough days, times and places to show up for your
work, being around people who get it like here making consistent progress.
I'm convinced that what's holding you back as a writer is not knowing
the techniques or knowing the rules.
It's believing that you're allowed to do this.
It's having, making the time.
It's getting rid of the fear and the blocks and giving yourself permission to
write, to be a learner to make mistakes.
Even if you're not making a living at it.
To make time for your writing.
I mean, you don't, that's not the only route to success.
You've probably heard me say that before.
You could take a lifetime to explore the craft alone, but this inner
work of being a writer is where the really cool stuff starts to happen.
When you give yourself permission to write, when you carve out time to write,
when you delve deeply into the human psyche to build characters and put them
in difficult situations and help them become amazing human beings, you become
an amazing human being more than, you know, there's so much amazing in you
that when you're writing it starts to spill out into the rest of your life.
You are more fun to be with.
Your day job gets easier.
You're more creative.
You become a better problem solver and people feel that.
And they're drawn to you.
You become more attractive because you are feeding the part
of you that is most truly you.
This work is important.
This work takes a lifetime.
And luckily for you, that's what you've got.
Right when you get off this call, you've got a lifetime waiting
for you, the rest of your life.
Let's not waste it.
So at this point, you have a choice.
If you want, all that comes along with a full writing life.
You can make a personal commitment to write more and you might even do it.
People do.
Sometimes people make it stick, but if you've ever embarked on a writing
push before full of enthusiasm, sure
you're going to get it right this time only to have it peter
out, what do you need to change?
We've all been there.
And the fear of it happening again, can hold us back for months or years
wasting time worrying about failure.
When we could have been using that time to become a better writer, maybe even a great
writer and certainly a great human being.
Over this past week, you have definitely accomplished more than many would- be
writers well accomplished all year.
And you did it because you turned up, you practiced, you
hung out with other writers.
You came here.
You put your pen to paper right here in the heart of the StoryADay community.
And that's the next part, a piece of the puzzle.
I want to tell you.
Every year, since StoryADay , May, 2010, I've seen people go through the
challenge and then they would fall away and they would like disappear
for a year and then they would come back and they would complain that
they had lost ground in their writing.
So in 20 te 2018, I put together a group of people who wanted to hang out
together to write together, to hold space for each other and to learn together.
And you've heard us talk about them.
You've met some of them this morning.
They're called the StoryADay Superstars.
And you've seen how caring, thoughtful, enthusiastic, and
relaxed they are about their writing.
That's not an accident, We've spent four years building this community in
a way of being that helps all of us get our writing done, take the next step.
Whether that is writing more writing, better finding readers, feeling
understood, enhancing our everyday lives.
I want to ask if you want to continue struggling on alone or
do you want to stay on this writing path, learning what your writing life looks
like when you're in a group of writers who are on your team, who get it, who
will guide and support you and push you to write, write a lot and write better.
So that you finally become that someone who is turning out stories regularly
engaging in the world in an excited way, because it's your sandbox.
It's your inspiration.
Someone who's eager to write, not dreading it and someone who's ready
to send their stories out into the world and to have an impact.
I don't think it's overstating it to say that when you approach your
writing with integrity and joy, you are making yourself better.
You're improving the lives of the people you love because you're
more fulfilled and your stories are connecting with reader's brains.
You've seen it this morning, taking them inside the emotions of another
human being changing hearts, creating empathy, making the world better place.
So do you want to be able to write whenever you have a free moment,
do you wanna be able to finish stories, have confidence that
your writing's getting better?
Are you ready to do it today?
Not someday.
And are you ready to do what it takes to get there then if you
are, I'm delighted to invite you.
And in invitation, I have not extended for six months to join us
in the StoryADay superstars group.
The StoryADay Superstars group is a writing conference retreat
workshop, peer group masterclass in your pocket all year long.
You deserve a place where you can rediscover how to have more energy
for other parts of your life.
Find everything else in your life.
A little easier problem solve, make decisions like a champ,
make cool connections faster.
Be curious, generous, empathetic, engaging, connected
to the whole of humanity and.
In contact with the rest of humanity without having to
make eye contact with them.
Although quite often we do.
And the story day superstars end up connecting in the real world as well.
Your mission should you choose to accept it is to join us in the
StoryADay Superstars groups so that you can learn what you love to write,
how to write it better and what tools and practices you need to become
a better, more prolific writer.
So you can share more stories with more readers and begin
to hear that magical feedback.
"I loved your story because", and "thank you for writing this story.
It meant so much to me".
As a Superstar, you get a way to keep the writing momentum going all year.
You get instruction on the writing craft that pushes you to the next level.
You get a place to connect with other writers who you'll come to know and
who will celebrate your successes.
So you always feel writing is a valid and important part of your life,
whether or not you have anyone else in your everyday life, outside that door,
who gets it an opportunity to build a writing practice that fits your life
as it is right now, it's easy to tell yourself, you can get these things by
lurking anonymously in a writer's forum or a Facebook group, or by following
your favorite writers on Twitter.
But I would ask you, how has that worked for you in the past?
Are you where you want to be.
So, how do Superstars help you with all of that stuff?
As a Superstar, you'll spend a year with us learning how to be the writer you want
to be through every season of the year, by doing it in a supportive group with
times that you can carve out and put in your calendar to show up for yourself,
we have writing sprints almost daily, sometimes multiple times a day, where
you can show up and get some work done.
We have monthly special events, which might be a workshop or a
critique group like this, or extra support during the challenges, master
classes and other special events.
There's one of those every month.
There's two to three opportunities every month to come and hang out
and just have deep discussions with each other at a variety of times.
So you should be able to find one that works for you.
We have a private community currently in Slack where you can support, each
other it's like kind of like a Facebook group, but without the whole Facebook
thing and without anybody else posting about their pets and, and politics.
And with Superstars from around the globe, there's usually somebody up
who can give you a high five or an answer, got people in New Zealand
and India and California, and Sweden.
I organize everything so that you don't have to.
As someone who struggles in groups where things aren't very well organized
and pop up at the last minute.
I make sure that you always get reminders for everything.
There's a calendar you can subscribe to their emails.
Everything's archived in the member site.
Reminders pop up in slack.
So whether or not you ignore your email and pay attention to your calendar or
vice versa, there's a way to make sure that you don't miss anything here.
You've been doing this for a while now, maybe you've been
lurking at StoryADay today.
I am asking you to stop lurking, step out of the shadows and show up for yourself.
And frankly, for us, we are enriched by every new member, your experience,
your questions, your presence.
I really want you to hear me.
When I say this, you are a gift to the world.
We want to help you share that gift.
So at this point, you're probably thinking what you'd have to
invest for access to all this.
I looked up a flash fiction course recently it was six
weeks long and it cost $250.
So I did the math for you.
That's about $177 a month.
If you wanted to do like a monthly thing, our daily writing sprints are
like a writing retreat on demand.
I did some research on writing retreats a four day retreat averaged about $400.
Before the cost of travel and accommodation.
So that's about a hundred dollars a day, multiply that by 365 and we're getting
into silly money territory, coaching can cost you between 65 and $200 an hour.
We do three, two to three Hangouts where you can get access to me and all
of these amazing minds in Superstars.
There's just thousands of dollars of coaching time.
And it's still a bargain compared to the price of an MFA at an average college,
which is like 68,000 a year for one year.
And they're never one year.
So people do create courses for writers that cost thousands
and thousands and thousands and hundreds of thousands of dollars.
Most of us can't find time or money for that.
So I built the Superstars to bring together as many interesting
committed people as I can.
To harness the power of that crowd.
I want the community to contain the most motivated writers I can find.
And what tells me that you're motivated?
You read my emails.
You turn up for events like this, you do the work.
And you show me and yourself that you are ready for the next step.
I want people like you to join us, spend the next 12 months refining
your storytelling skills, building a writing practice in what I believe
is the most supportive kick ass writing community that I can find.
I want you to join us.
I want you to experience that and have so much fun doing it that
you wonder what took you so long.
So I'm inviting you to join the StoryADay Superstars for an investment
of $997 for the year, less than the cost of a frothy coffee every day,
less than the cost of taking one of my workshops every month and considerably
less than the cost of traveling to a conference or getting an MFA.
You get this amazing community that will hold space for you and your writing.
And as I was putting this message together, I thought, what about.
What you could achieve in the next 12 months is pretty awesome with all that
space and guidance and support and time.
And I got really excited thinking about all of that, the amazing
progress that you're going to make.
And I thought, what else do you need?
So I thought, if someone's just joined superstars, what could they
use to get started straight away and make sure that they make progress?
So I built this Stages workshop, especially for superstars.
It helps you figure out where you are, where you want to be,
and then what's the very next tiniest step you can take to get.
To the next stage in your writing life.
And it covers not just writing, but all the things that go into a
writing life, no more overwhelm.
One day I'll offer this course separately and it'll be about
$500, but I haven't done that yet.
So it's not available anywhere else.
And then I realize a library of every workbook and worksheet
that I've ever created.
Even some audio meditations helped me, you and the other Superstars get more
quickly to the creative work and spend less time blocked, stuck, or indecisive.
And then I realized I already have every workshop I've ever
given every masterclass recorded.
And so I thought, if you need to know how to make your characters more compelling
or how to write better dialogue, or how to prepare a story for submission or how to
write your bio, you can just pop into that archive anytime and brush up your skills.
There's over 20 workshops in there, which is like $3,000
worth of workshops on demand.
And that's all in the portal for you too.
I want you to succeed.
I've put a lot of thought into what that looks like.
No matter whether you simply want to be a build a, a writing practice
or you want to be sending stuff out to magazines, I've got you covered.
And then I thought you were on the fence about this.
What else do people ask about when I, when they ask about writing and
it often comes down to budget and a burning desire to really give
yourself permission to be a writer.
So if a 12 payment plan would make it easier for you to manage your
cash flow and still join the group,
here you go.
More importantly, if you wanna spend a few hours with us at our virtual
retreat in December, looking back at the past and making plans for 2023,
I'm adding that to Superstars too.
These retreats I've been hugely inspiring in the past and a wonderful
way to connect more deeply with the other writers in the group.
All of which leads you to becoming more sure, productive, creative, and fulfilled.
This is your chance, and this doesn't cost you any extra.
All you have to do is climb down off the fence and join us in superstars.
So, what are you getting?
You're getting the superstars group with the monthly events and the three critique
weeks, a year, the stages workshop, which isn't available anywhere else, every
worksheet and workbook I've ever produced.
An archive of over 20 workshops and master classes with video, audio,
written notes, closed captions, whatever your learning style is.
And an invitation to our virtual retreat in December, I'm only opening
up registration for a very few days.
It's only open until Wednesday, September the 21st.
And like I say, last time was six months ago when I opened this up because I
really want to get busy, getting everybody into the community, getting them settled
and and going forward with the writing.
So I'm not, I just don't do this very often and I hope you'll
take advantage of it this time.
You're here.
You've proven to me and to yourself.
I think that you're serious.
I think you might be a superstar already.
So let's make it official.
I hope you'll join us.
And I really want to thank you for being here today.
I want you to thank you for being generous with your time and your
feedback and your questions.
And most of all, I want to ask you to please keep writing