This idea for a story is ripped from the song “Them’s The Vagaries” by Half Man Half Biscuit (thanks, guys!). The narrator says, near the start of the song, “Now we’ve kissed I’ve prepared this list, I thought you ought to know…” and goes on to tell his new love about all his quirks starting with “I’ll not sit backwards on the train” and proceeding down to the most bizarre of pet peeves.

The Prompt

Write a story that begins “Now that we’ve kissed, here are some things you ought to know”

Tips

• Write this as a monologue or a dialogue, whichever works for you.
• This has the potential to be funny or tragic.
• Feel free to write this as a list (like the McSweeney’s lists) or as a series of tweets, or as an oral history (which will make it more like a traditional short story in form).
• Even if you go with the non-traditional forms (lists etc) there is still a lot of scope for the beginning, middle, end structure.
• Only the journey you take your readers on will be emotional, rather than literal (from flippant to poignant; from innocent to creepy…).
• Think of the most colorful people you have ever met or the worst date you were ever on. Imagine one of those people writing this.