In an early scene in the ‘fish out of water story’ TV show Ted Lasso, Ted—an American—is offered a cup of tea by his British host. He sips the tea and promptly spits it out…right into the face of his glamorous new boss.
“It’s horrible,” he says, shaking his head.
Same, Ted. Same.
I have a cup of tea about once a year, just to make sure I’m not missing something.
Nope. Still horrible.
What Does “Discipline” Taste Like, To A Writer?
When I ask writers about their biggest challenge ‘time’ is always number one, with ‘focus’ or ‘discipline’ or ‘consistency’ running a close second.
But what does ‘more focused’, ‘more disciplined’ or ‘more consistent’ look, smell, feel, and taste like?
As a Brit, ‘tea’, to me, has a narrow definition. “Tea”=black tea…and I do not like it.
But if we allow ‘tea’ the more expansive definition Americans often use, I can like ‘tea’. There are plenty of herbal infusions that give me actual pleasure.
Define The Terms
The ‘Productivity industry’ has a lot to answer for.
It has pushed a grim vision of ‘discipline’ that says if you don’t show up every day, and suffer a bit, you’re failing.
I bought into it.
I started the StoryADay May Challenge because I thought I needed to write every day to ‘be a writer’. I couldn’t make myself do it for more than about 12 days and I thought that accountability and the threat of public shame would fix that.
Confession time
Forgive me writers, for I have failed: I have never once created that unbroken streak of days when I started and finished a story for 31 days in a row.
Not once in 16 years.
Does that mean I’m not disciplined enough to be a writer?
I’ve certainly wasted enough time worrying about that, over the years.
Maybe you have, too.
They Laughed At Me (in the nicest possible way)
It took other people laughing at me (kindly) to make me notice that there is a certain discipline (stubbornness?) and consistency in:
- Running an annual challenge for 16 years straight;
- Writing five novel drafts;
- Writing enough short stories—and sending them to enough markets—that some of them have been published;
- Leading a writing community for 8 years;
- Producing almost 340 podcast episodes and writing almost 2,500 blog posts about this writing journey we’re all on.
I still can’t write fiction every day.
AND I have learned so much.
‘Failing’ my own challenge year after year is a delightful reminder to me that ‘disciplined’, ‘consistent’, or ‘focused’ are never going to look, for me, like creating an unbroken streak of days where I write new words. (Your mileage may vary.)
I need days off. I need time to wander around and breathe in life, without the pressure of having to synthesize those experiences and breathe them out into new words, today
.For me, ‘consistency’ and ‘discipline’ will likely always be lumpy, seasonal, cyclical things.
Sometimes it looks like generating new words.
Sometimes it looks like learning new skills
Sometimes it looks like taking two steps backwards as I experiment
Sometimes, yes, it looks like staring out of the window or going on a long walk.
And it all adds up.
Do This Now
If you keep telling yourself you’re ‘failing’ to be consistent or ‘disciplined’ in your writing, look back over your lifetime and notice the times when you were most productive.
- What was working for you, then? (And it’s more than ‘I had more time’. It’s also ‘I had something I was trying to achieve’ or ‘I had someone cheering me on’ or even ‘I was paying for a class so I showed up’)
- Did you ever need to sit at your desk for 3-4 hours every weekday to produce quality writing? (If not, why would you think that’s what a ‘successful writing life’ looks like, now?)
- Take a look at your upcoming week and ask ‘what’s the tiniest step I could take to show up for my writing this week?’. Then put that on a piece of paper and carry it around with you. Do it. Celebrate with a dance party in the privacy of your bedroom (I suggest listening to music you loved as a teenager). Then come back and do it again.
Practice joy in your writing life enough, and you’ll start to crave it.
Consistency and discipline become issues you never have to worry about, because you’re chasing something better.
LEAVE A COMMENT: What has helped you feel more successful/joyful in your writing lately? What is an essential part of your practice? What’s negotiable?
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